• The Writer


    Hello! My name is Laura, welcome to my blog! I write weird stories, collect dragon plushies and stay up too late with my nose in a book. I am a wife, mom and child saved by grace. My hope is that you find encouragement here or at least a smile or too.
    God bless!

  • “Now go, write it before them in a table, and note it in a book that it may be for the time to come forever and ever.”
    ~Isaiah 30:8.

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  • Quotes

    We have come from God, and inevitably the myths woven by us, though they contain error, will also reflect a splintered fragment of the true light, the eternal truth that is with God. Indeed only by myth-making, only by becoming 'sub-creator' and inventing stories, can Man aspire to the state of perfection that he knew before the Fall. Our myths may be misguided, but they steer however shakily towards the true harbour, while materialistic 'progress' leads only to a yawning abyss and the Iron Crown of the power of evil.
    ~J.R.R. Tolkien

    "The only just literary critic," he concluded, "is Christ, who admires more than does any man the gifts He Himself has bestowed."
    ~J.R.R. Tolkien

    “Fantasy is escapist, and that is its glory. If a soldier is imprisioned by the enemy, don't we consider it his duty to escape?. . .If we value the freedom of mind and soul, if we're partisans of liberty, then it's our plain duty to escape, and to take as many people with us as we can!”
    ~J.R.R. Tolkien

    "Writers who see by the light of their Christian faith will have, in these times, the sharpest eye for the grotesque, for the perverse, and for the unacceptable. To the hard of hearing you shout, and for the almost-blind you draw large and startling figures."
    ~Flannery O'Connor

    You write to communicate to the hearts and minds of others what’s burning inside you. And we edit to let the fire show through the smoke.
    ~Arthur Polotnik

    Words - so innocent and powerless as they are, as standing in a dictionary, how potent for good and evil they become in the hands of one who knows how to combine them.
    ~Nathaniel Hawthorne

    "There are forms of insanity that condemn people to hear voices against their will, but as writers we invite ourselves to hear voices without relinquishing our hold on reality or our right to control."
    ~Writing Fiction by Janet Burroway

    Christians have sometimes been suspicious of stories, because they really can influence you. If you read the Twilight novels once a month for a year, I think you'd be a different human afterward—and not a sparkly one.
    ~Nate Wilson

His Blood (A Story for Good Friday)

No, that’s can’t be him.  How can that be him?

The crowd thronged around me.  Hundreds of people were pushing and shoving, trying to get a clear view of the procession moving up the street.  I stared at the man being driven along by the whips of Roman soldiers, the weight of a crosses beams pressing against his bleeding shoulder.  I wanted to rush in and set him free.  I knew the sting of those whips, knew the humiliation they brought.

How could they be doing this to him?  What had he done?  A lump formed in my throat, I tried to swallow it, but it wouldn’t yield.  What had he done?  He saved me.  Me, a bitter slave, he had called me by name.  He had done the same for so many others.  Why?  Jehovah why?!

“Dafydd!”

I turned and looked over my shoulder.  Laurel was trying to get to me through the crowd.  I forced my way to her.  Once I reached her she took my hand and pulled me away from the crowd.  The throng continued to move up the street.

“Dafydd, it’s him isn’t it?” She looked up at me, tears glistening in her eyes.  Those eyes, not long ago they were clouded and couldn’t see.  Now she stared up at me, her eyes clear and whole.

I nodded.

“Why?”

“I… I don’t know.”

“Can’t we do something?”

I shook my head.  “Come,” I squeezed her hand.  “The people have moved on, if we don’t hurry, we will miss him.”

Laurel gripped my hand and let me lead her up the street.  We passed through the gate and stared at the sight that met our eyes.  Golgotha, the place of the skull. The Romans preferred this spot for their executions.  It was outside a city gate, on raised ground where everyone could see.  The people were gathered around the hill, I could hear women wailing.  Admits the calmer of voices and the wails of the anguished the strike of a hammer rang out along with the cries of a man.

My stomach knotted.

We made our way up the hill.  As we neared the top Roman soldiers heaved on ropes and three crosses rose up, each with a man nailed to the beams.  Laurel pulled me to a stop, covering her mouth to stifle a cry.

There he was, Jesus, the master, hanging there, dying.  No!  My own eyes filled with tears and I feel to my knees.  Jehovah no!  Laurel knelt beside me, her body shacking with sobs.  I raised my eyes and gazed at his altered form.  His body was so bloody, his face so torn, I hardly recognized him.  Could it really be him?  Maybe it was all a dream, just a terrible dream.  A crown of thorns dug into his skull, a mocking sigh hung over his head, “The King of The Jews”.  It was real, all of it.

A group of robed priests stood not too far from where Laurel and I knelt.  I glanced at them.  They’re faces were stoic.  What did they think of the injustice they had caused?  An innocent man was dying before them, and they just stood and watched.  I knew the blood of the master was on their hands.

I clenched my fists.  Before, I would have cursed them, wished hell to fall on their heads, but now, now I pitied them.  I looked back to the cross, his cross.  He was the reason the hate was gone from my heart, and now he was dying.  They had killed him.

Someone shoved by me.  I fell forward, catching myself before my face could slam into the ground.  My hands landed in wetness.  I raised them, staring at me palms.  Blood covered my hands.  I looked down at the ground, a trail of red spread from where I knelt to the cross where Jesus hung.  Fresh tears rolled down my cheeks.

“Dafydd?”  Laurel looked at me.

“His blood… His blood is on my hands.”

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Today in Hell, By Morning, In Paradise

This is a story I wrote for my Fiction Writing class.  Let me know what you think.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I would die at dawn, the guard told me that evening. 

As he held a plate of stale bread inches away from my groping hand he said with a sneer.   “We do not feed the condemned, Christianus.”  Christian. 

He spat the word out like bad wine and retreated, taking the treasured food with him.  I clutched at the bars of my cell staring after him, listening to his footsteps echo and fade into nothing.  Hunger clawed at my stomach, a painful ache digging through my gut.  Was it hunger?  Or was it the reality of my fate?  Tomorrow I would die.  I sank to the ground and wrapped my arms around my thin frame, the chains about my ankles ratting with the movement.  The coarse wool of my ragged clothing cut into my skin, the smell of my own filth hung thick in the air of my little cell.  I held my breath and squeezed my eyes close, shutting everything out.  No, no, NO!  What had brought me to this? 

My ears began to ring, my lungs begged for air.  I held on, maybe, maybe I could end it all right here, right now, save myself the pain of a Roman execution.  My life is no longer in my hands.  I had said those words, all thoughs years ago, putting my fate in another’s hands.    I gasped, opening my eyes and heaving in great gulps of air.  Tears stung my eyes and traced salty trails down my checks. 

As a boy, my father had told me men didn’t cry, but my father hadn’t known what would happen.  He hadn’t known the Romans would come and kill him.  He hadn’t known I would be taken to live out my days as a slave, never again to see my beloved Britton.  So I cried.  I cried for the past, for the boy I had once been, free in my homeland.  I cried for my fate, for the flames that awaited me come the dawn. 

My heart filled with anguish I raised my tear stained face to the small shaft of light flickering against the wall from a torch across the way. 

“Deus donavi meus ultionis!”  God give me vengeance!  I shook my fist, yelling in the Latin tongue at the light as if it represented the presence of God in this foul place.  Give me vengeance. 

My life is no longer in my hands.  I had given it away, let it go.  He had given his, what more was I to do with mine?  

I was afraid to die.  Afraid of the pain, but I could still escape it, I could still live. 

“Deny, deny your faith and you shall go free.”

I stared at the procurator; my chains seemed to grow heavier as if to embellish his words.  Deny, simple enough.  They were words only were they not?  God would still see what was in my heart, see I still believed though my tongue said otherwise.  I could live, continue serving Him.  What good was I dead?  All I had to do was say three simple words – “I deny Christ” – and I would go free.  Free.  The flames would devour another martyr, but not me. 

“Well?  What say you?”  The procurator stood looking down his nose at me, awaiting my reply.  “Stop preaching this false faith, deny the Christian God and your life will be spared.” 

Why was I hesitating?  Why was I silent?  Lord, I do not want to die.

The procurator gave an exasperated sigh and waved his hand at the guards.  “Take him away.”

I was dragged to me feet and hauled from the room, my chains clattering on the marble floor.

“There is still time, if you should choose to change your mind.”  The procurator’s words fallowed me from the hall, ringing in my ears.

I thought of them now, wondering where I would be and what I would be doing at this moment had I said those words.  Perhaps I’d be sitting with Laurel, our hands clasped together, speaking of our upcoming marriage.  Laurel, I could still see her face when they came to take me away.  She cried my name, her voice wrought with anguish and fear.

“Dafydd!”   

Oh, to see her again!  To lose myself in her dark eyes and the sound of her bell-like laughter. 

“Lord,” I prayed.  “Protect her; do not let her suffer my fate.” 

My fate; I wondered at my words.  Had I chosen to die?  I remembered that day, how many years ago?  The teacher, dying in agony on a Roman cross above my head, hardly recognizable as the man I had known.  He was innocent of any crime, just as I was now, but they had killed him and he had allowed it.  He had chosen death, could I do the same?  I followed him, I spoke in his name, but could I die for him?  So many had died already, they did not deny him.    

“Lord, you can see my heart, can you not?  You can see my fear, how can I do this?  Can I not serve you more by living to spread your Word?  What of my life with Laurel?  I will never see her again in this life, never have a life together.  God, how is this part of your will?  What have I done that you would abandon me to the flames?  Let me live!” 

My voice echoed back to me, bouncing against the stone walls, let me live! 

“He never abandons us Dafydd.  We are mere men; we cannot comprehend his thoughts or his plans.”  Stephen, his words returned to me.  “He sets a path before us and leaves us with the choice to walk it.  What will you choose Dafydd?” 

Stephen died, stoned for his beliefs.  He had stood fast, facing death.  Could I do the same? 

“Could I?” 

I thought back to the day I had met the Teacher.  The day he had given Laurel back her sight and in a way, he had given sight to my blind eyes.  I was a bitter slave, cursing those who had killed my family and taken me from my homeland to live a life of bondage among a people who thought of me as chattel.  My heart was filled with nothing but hate.  Laurel had tried to show me love, she had taught me Latin, nursed my wounds after beatings, but the hate in my heart blinded me to her kindness.  I was more a captive to myself and the bitterness inside then I ever was as a slave.  It ate at me, tearing my mind apart; then he came.

He healed my shattered heart.  Never before had I felt so liberated.  The hate, the bitterness, the hurt, it was all swept away at the touch of his hand and the sound of his voice calling my name.  He had shown me how to forgive those who had slaughtered my family and enslaved me.  Though by law I was still a slave, in my heart and soul, I was freed forever.

How could I deny that?  How could I deny the hope, the peace, the joy, the freedom I had been given?  I couldn’t.  I could not betray the love that had given me new life. 

“Acceptus calicis ex meus,” Take this cup from me.  “My life is in your hands.”            

As a cold chill crawled up my spine I shivered.  The night would soon be over, my last night on earth.  I leaned against the moist stones of my cell.  The slow drip of water sounded from somewhere in the gloom.  Laughter of the guards and cries of fellow captives could be heard as faint whispers in the silence of the prison.  I looked around me, the stench, the darkness, the hunger, this place was hell, but tomorrow, tomorrow I would find paradise.

My life is in your hands.     

The End

 

Pronunciation guide:

Dafydd – (Da-vith)
     a: short as in can

Easter: What Jesus did for us.

Mark 14

14:10 And Judas Iscariot, one of the twelve,
went unto the chief priests, to betray him unto them.

14:11 And when they heard it, they were glad, and promised to give him money.
And he sought how he might conveniently betray him.

14:12 And the first day of unleavened bread, when they killed the passover, his disciples said unto him, Where wilt thou that we go and prepare that thou mayest eat the passover?

14:13 And he sendeth forth two of his disciples, and saith unto them,
Go ye into the city, and there shall meet you a man bearing a pitcher of water: follow him.

14:14 And wheresoever he shall go in, say ye to the goodman of the house,
The Master saith, Where is the guestchamber, where I shall eat the passover with my disciples?

14:15 And he will shew you a large upper room furnished and prepared: there make ready for us.

14:16 And his disciples went forth, and came into the city, and found as he had said unto them:
and they made ready the passover.

14:17 And in the evening he cometh with the twelve.

14:18 And as they sat and did eat, Jesus said,
Verily I say unto you,
One of you which eateth with me shall betray me.

14:19 And they began to be sorrowful, and to say unto him one by one, Is it I?
and another said, Is it I?

14:20 And he answered and said unto them,
It is one of the twelve, that dippeth with me in the dish.

14:21 The Son of man indeed goeth, as it is written of him:
but woe to that man by whom the Son of man is betrayed!
good were it for that man if he had never been born.

14:22 And as they did eat, Jesus took bread, and blessed,
and brake it, and gave to them, and said, Take, eat: this is my body.

14:23 And he took the cup, and when he had given thanks,
he gave it to them: and they all drank of it.

14:24 And he said unto them,
This is my blood of the new testament, which is shed for many.

14:25 Verily I say unto you,
I will drink no more of the fruit of the vine, until that day that I drink it new in the kingdom of God.

14:26 And when they had sung an hymn, they went out into the mount of Olives.

14:27 And Jesus saith unto them,
All ye shall be offended because of me this night:
for it is written, I will smite the shepherd, and the sheep shall be scattered.

14:28 But after that I am risen, I will go before you into Galilee.

14:29 But Peter said unto him,
Although all shall be offended, yet will not I.

14:30 And Jesus saith unto him,
Verily I say unto thee,
That this day, even in this night, before the cock crow twice, thou shalt deny me thrice.

14:31 But he spake the more vehemently,
If I should die with thee, I will not deny thee in any wise.
Likewise also said they all.

14:32 And they came to a place which was named Gethsemane:
and he saith to his disciples, Sit ye here, while I shall pray.

14:33 And he taketh with him Peter and James and John,
and began to be sore amazed, and to be very heavy;

14:34 And saith unto them,
My soul is exceeding sorrowful unto death: tarry ye here, and watch.

14:35 And he went forward a little, and fell on the ground,
and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him.

14:36 And he said,
Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee; take away this cup from me:
nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt.

14:37 And he cometh, and findeth them sleeping, and saith unto Peter,
Simon, sleepest thou? couldest not thou watch one hour?

14:38 Watch ye and pray, lest ye enter into temptation.
The spirit truly is ready, but the flesh is weak.

14:39 And again he went away, and prayed, and spake the same words.

14:40 And when he returned, he found them asleep again,
(for their eyes were heavy,) neither wist they what to answer him.

14:41 And he cometh the third time, and saith unto them,
Sleep on now, and take your rest: it is enough, the hour is come;
behold, the Son of man is betrayed into the hands of sinners.

14:42 Rise up, let us go; lo, he that betrayeth me is at hand.

14:43 And immediately, while he yet spake, cometh Judas, one of the twelve,
and with him a great multitude with swords and staves,
from the chief priests and the scribes and the elders.

14:44 And he that betrayed him had given them a token, saying,
Whomsoever I shall kiss, that same is he; take him, and lead him away safely.

14:45 And as soon as he was come, he goeth straightway to him,
and saith, Master, master; and kissed him.

14:46 And they laid their hands on him, and took him.

14:47 And one of them that stood by drew a sword,
and smote a servant of the high priest, and cut off his ear.

14:48 And Jesus answered and said unto them,
Are ye come out, as against a thief, with swords and with staves to take me?

14:49 I was daily with you in the temple teaching, and ye took me not:
but the scriptures must be fulfilled.

14:50 And they all forsook him, and fled.

14:51 And there followed him a certain young man, having a linen cloth cast about his naked body;
and the young men laid hold on him:

14:52 And he left the linen cloth, and fled from them naked.

14:53 And they led Jesus away to the high priest:
and with him were assembled all the chief priests and the elders and the scribes.

14:54 And Peter followed him afar off, even into the palace of the high priest:
and he sat with the servants, and warmed himself at the fire.

14:55 And the chief priests and all the council sought for witness against Jesus to put him to death;
and found none.

14:56 For many bare false witness against him, but their witness agreed not together.

14:57 And there arose certain, and bare false witness against him, saying,

14:58 We heard him say, I will destroy this temple that is made with hands,
and within three days I will build another made without hands.

14:59 But neither so did their witness agree together.

14:60 And the high priest stood up in the midst, and asked Jesus, saying,
Answerest thou nothing? what is it which these witness against thee?

14:61 But he held his peace, and answered nothing.
Again the high priest asked him, and said unto him,
Art thou the Christ, the Son of the Blessed?

14:62 And Jesus said,
I am: and ye shall see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of power,
and coming in the clouds of heaven.

14:63 Then the high priest rent his clothes, and saith,
What need we any further witnesses?

14:64 Ye have heard the blasphemy: what think ye?
And they all condemned him to be guilty of death.

14:65 And some began to spit on him, and to cover his face,
and to buffet him, and to say unto him, Prophesy:
and the servants did strike him with the palms of their hands.

14:66 And as Peter was beneath in the palace, there cometh one of the maids of the high priest:

14:67 And when she saw Peter warming himself, she looked upon him,
and said, And thou also wast with Jesus of Nazareth.

14:68 But he denied, saying,
I know not, neither understand I what thou sayest.
And he went out into the porch; and the cock crew.

14:69 And a maid saw him again, and began to say to them that stood by, This is one of them.

14:70 And he denied it again.
And a little after, they that stood by said again to Peter,
Surely thou art one of them: for thou art a Galilaean, and thy speech agreeth thereto.

14:71 But he began to curse and to swear, saying,
I know not this man of whom ye speak.

14:72 And the second time the cock crew.
And Peter called to mind the word that Jesus said unto him,
Before the cock crow twice, thou shalt deny me thrice.
And when he thought thereon, he wept.

Mark 15

15:1 And straightway in the morning the chief priests held a consultation with the elders and scribes
and the whole council, and bound Jesus, and carried him away, and delivered him to Pilate.

15:2 And Pilate asked him, Art thou the King of the Jews?
And he answering said unto them, Thou sayest it.

15:3 And the chief priests accused him of many things: but he answered nothing.

15:4 And Pilate asked him again, saying, Answerest thou nothing?
behold how many things they witness against thee.

15:5 But Jesus yet answered nothing; so that Pilate marvelled.

15:6 Now at that feast he released unto them one prisoner, whomsoever they desired.

15:7 And there was one named Barabbas,
which lay bound with them that had made insurrection with him,
who had committed murder in the insurrection.

15:8 And the multitude crying aloud began to desire him to do as he had ever done unto them.

15:9 But Pilate answered them, saying,
Will ye that I release unto you the King of the Jews?

15:10 For he knew that the chief priests had delivered him for envy.

15:11 But the chief priests moved the people,
that he should rather release Barabbas unto them.

15:12 And Pilate answered and said again unto them,
What will ye then that I shall do unto him whom ye call the King of the Jews?

15:13 And they cried out again, Crucify him.

15:14 Then Pilate said unto them, Why, what evil hath he done?
And they cried out the more exceedingly, Crucify him.

15:15 And so Pilate, willing to content the people, released Barabbas unto them,
and delivered Jesus, when he had scourged him, to be crucified.

15:16 And the soldiers led him away into the hall, called Praetorium;
and they call together the whole band.

15:17 And they clothed him with purple, and platted a crown of thorns, and put it about his head,

15:18 And began to salute him, Hail, King of the Jews!

15:19 And they smote him on the head with a reed, and did spit upon him,
and bowing their knees worshipped him.

15:20 And when they had mocked him, they took off the purple from him,
and put his own clothes on him, and led him out to crucify him.

15:21 And they compel one Simon a Cyrenian, who passed by, coming out of the country,
the father of Alexander and Rufus, to bear his cross.

15:22 And they bring him unto the place Golgotha, which is, being interpreted, The place of a skull.

15:23 And they gave him to drink wine mingled with myrrh: but he received it not.

15:24 And when they had crucified him, they parted his garments,
casting lots upon them, what every man should take.

15:25 And it was the third hour, and they crucified him.

15:26 And the superscription of his accusation was written over, THE KING OF THE JEWS.

15:27 And with him they crucify two thieves; the one on his right hand, and the other on his left.

15:28 And the scripture was fulfilled, which saith, And he was numbered with the transgressors.

15:29 And they that passed by railed on him, wagging their heads, and saying,
Ah, thou that destroyest the temple, and buildest it in three days,

15:30 Save thyself, and come down from the cross.

15:31 Likewise also the chief priests mocking said among themselves with the scribes,
He saved others; himself he cannot save.

15:32 Let Christ the King of Israel descend now from the cross, that we may see and believe.
And they that were crucified with him reviled him.

15:33 And when the sixth hour was come,
there was darkness over the whole land until the ninth hour.

15:34 And at the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying,
Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani? which is, being interpreted, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?

15:35 And some of them that stood by, when they heard it, said, Behold, he calleth Elias.

15:36 And one ran and filled a spunge full of vinegar,
and put it on a reed, and gave him to drink, saying,
Let alone; let us see whether Elias will come to take him down.

15:37 And Jesus cried with a loud voice, and gave up the ghost.

15:38 And the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom.

15:39 And when the centurion, which stood over against him,
saw that he so cried out, and gave up the ghost, he said, Truly this man was the Son of God.

15:40 There were also women looking on afar off:
among whom was Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James the less and of Joses, and Salome;

15:41 (Who also, when he was in Galilee, followed him, and ministered unto him;)
and many other women which came up with him unto Jerusalem.

15:42 And now when the even was come, because it was the preparation,
that is, the day before the sabbath,

15:43 Joseph of Arimathaea, an honourable counsellor,
which also waited for the kingdom of God, came,
and went in boldly unto Pilate, and craved the body of Jesus.

15:44 And Pilate marvelled if he were already dead:
and calling unto him the centurion, he asked him whether he had been any while dead.

15:45 And when he knew it of the centurion, he gave the body to Joseph.

15:46 And he bought fine linen, and took him down, and wrapped him in the linen,
and laid him in a sepulchre which was hewn out of a rock,
and rolled a stone unto the door of the sepulchre.

15:47 And Mary Magdalene and Mary the mother of Joses beheld where he was laid.

Mark 16

16:1 And when the sabbath was past, Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James,
and Salome, had bought sweet spices, that they might come and anoint him.

16:2 And very early in the morning the first day of the week,
they came unto the sepulchre at the rising of the sun.

16:3 And they said among themselves,
Who shall roll us away the stone from the door of the sepulchre?

16:4 And when they looked, they saw that the stone was rolled away: for it was very great.

16:5 And entering into the sepulchre, they saw a young man sitting on the right side,
clothed in a long white garment; and they were affrighted.

16:6 And he saith unto them,
Be not affrighted: Ye seek Jesus of Nazareth, which was crucified:
he is risen; he is not here: behold the place where they laid him.

16:7 But go your way, tell his disciples and Peter that he goeth before you into Galilee:
there shall ye see him, as he said unto you.

16:8 And they went out quickly, and fled from the sepulchre;
for they trembled and were amazed: neither said they any thing to any man; for they were afraid.

16:9 Now when Jesus was risen early the first day of the week,
he appeared first to Mary Magdalene, out of whom he had cast seven devils.

16:10 And she went and told them that had been with him, as they mourned and wept.

16:11 And they, when they had heard that he was alive,
and had been seen of her, believed not.

16:12 After that he appeared in another form unto two of them,
as they walked, and went into the country.

16:13 And they went and told it unto the residue: neither believed they them.

16:14 Afterward he appeared unto the eleven as they sat at meat,
and upbraided them with their unbelief and hardness of heart,
because they believed not them which had seen him after he was risen.

16:15 And he said unto them,
Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.

16:16 He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.

16:17 And these signs shall follow them that believe;
In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues;

16:18 They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them;
they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.

16:19 So then after the Lord had spoken unto them,
he was received up into heaven, and sat on the right hand of God.

16:20 And they went forth, and preached every where,
the Lord working with them, and confirming the word with signs following. Amen

Rediscover (day 38): My ways are not your ways.

Photo of the Book of Isaiah page of the Bible

Image via Wikipedia

Seek ye the LORD while he may be found, call ye upon him while he is near:
Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the LORD, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.
For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater:
So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.  ~Isaiah 55:6-11

Coming into Rediscover, I had expectations of what I was going to get out of it.  I expected spiritual feelings of insight and God’s overwhelming presence.   I even went so far as to guess how He was going to change me and what He was going to reveal to me.  But it didn’t happen the way I thought it would, and as a result, I began to feel lost and discouraged.

I forgot that God’s ways are not my ways.

I had been looking for a call to action, a colossal size spiritual reawakening within my spirit.  I wanted to feel the change, I wanted it to be amazing!   But I missed something…

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.”

God had a different idea, a different and better plan then my human expectations.

As I was pouring out my sorrows to God about how I felt, as if I was doing this whole thing wrong.  How I felt so lost and unchanged, it finally hit me. I wanted action, amazing change, feelings, but it’s not about the feelings, and at the heart of it all, it wasn’t about the change.  Rediscover was about putting aside distractions and drawing closer to God. 

It was about letting go of everything, being still in His presence, and trusting Him completely.

I had forgotten to be still.  I forgotten it was FOR HIM I had made the choice to do this, NOT for me.  I had made my thoughts and ways higher than His.

It took nearly forty days to finally get this through my thick head, but it’s there now, I see, I understand.

So Father, what happens in the remaining two days of Rediscover, is up to You.   No more expectations.  You’re calling the shots.  I will be still and rest in Your resents, give You my everything, and let You lead.

For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater:
So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.”

Rediscover (day 31): Chaos

I honestly don’t know what to write.  My mind is a jumble of bazillion thoughts, all clamoring to be heard.

I can feel God tapping my shoulder, and sense His still small voice whispering for me to draw closer.  But the chaotic noise that surrounds me is trying to drown Him out.

So many things seem to be happening at once, but not in the physical.  My spirit has been stirred, my faith inspired, but my being is at war with something I cannot see.  The confusion is trying so desperately to take control.

The road I have chosen to walk has suddenly become strewn with sharp rocks and boulders of monstrous size.  The slop has become a cliff, and I am clinging to in a desperate attempt not to fall. 

But my sights are on the Lord my God.  The Enemy may blow a strong gale and try to pull me down or smash me against the rocks, but the LORD is on my side and nothing can take me from His hand.

I have purposed in my heart to let my life go and completely give Him my everything. 

The Enemy has upped his attack.

Lord Jesus, Heavenly Father, conquer the confusion.  I am listening for Your voice amidst the noise.  I am reaching out. 

Catch me.

Quiet the chaos.

Let me hear Your whisper.  

 

For I am persuaded, that neither death nor life nor angels nor principalities nor powers nor things present nor things to come, nor height, not depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

~Romans 8:38-39

Rediscover (days 20-23): Backsliding…and Pulling Up.

The past week… backslide. 

Yep. 

This week (but mostly the last few days) was hard, very hard.  I hit a wall and instead of building a ladder of prayer and asking God for a hand over, I just stood there and beat my head against it.

Monday started out great.  Tuesday and Wednesday were good.  Thursday… I broke just about all the rules. 

I e-mailed my friend, who I’m doing Rediscover with, telling her how bad I was, (she’s just awesome by the way).  We e-mailed and chatted about it and she let me know that it wasn’t just me who’s had a hard time this past week.  She was having trouble with slipping back into old habits too.  It’s so great to have a friend to be there, to do it together.  If it wasn’t for her, I would have quite by now.

Where one fails, two can succeed.  A three corded rope is not easily broken.  

So we confessed, prayed, and made a battle plan for the last nineteen days. 

Today starts a new week.  God is merciful and teaching me so much.  Week four, here we come, the three of us, together.

One thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. ~Phil. 3:13-14

Rediscover (day 19): A Brand New Day

This song by Fireflight says it all. 🙂

    I’m waking up
       The world is turning
           The sun is shining again
               I’m holding on
                 To things I shouldn’t
                    It’s time to let them go
                      I’ve been on a losing streak
                        Hit so hard I couldn’t speak
                          But when I hear Your voice it fades away

                            [Chorus:]
        And I can hear You say
            It’s a brand new day
              The pain goes away
                 I’m headed for the door
                    And I’m going home
                        I’m going home
                            I’m going home
                                I’m going home

Your love, it burns  away my darkness
       You guide me when I’m blind
          You are the light that shines inside me
               Showing me I’m so much more
                    When I’ve been on a losing streak
                        Hit so hard I couldn’t speak
                           But when I hear Your voice it fades away

                                Take me into Your arms
                                   My home lies within Your heart

                                           And I can hear You say
                                               It’s a brand new day

Every day with Jesus is a brand new day.  His mercy is new every morning.  Every sunrise is a chance to start over, to rededicate your life and purpose to live like Christ.  Let go of those things we hold so close, give it all away to Christ and listen for His voice.  We are worth so much to Him.  No matter how bad, or how far we strayed the day before, He will welcome us home with open arms.    

 The night is far spent, the day is at hand: let us therefore cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armour of light. ~Romans 13:12

Rediscover

I had the opportunity to spend on awesome evening with a really good friend last night.  In the car heading home we talked about how we’ve both been lacking in our spiritual walk with God.  Inspired to make a change we decided that for the next forty days, we would give up something/s that has been consuming our time and spend that extra time in the Word and praying.  We called it Rediscover, because our goal is to rediscover our faith and our walk with Christ.

What we chose to give up:  Pleasure reading and TV watching (including Hulu, YouTube, Netflix, any internet TV/movie viewing site, movies etc., with the exceptions of school reading and if our families want to have a family movie night.) 

Just to make it final we put it all in writing and signed it.  Starting today, and ending April 20th, we are focusing our time purely on God and reading His word.

I want to ask you readers; will you join us?  Will you give up something that has become an idol, eating at your time and taking you away from strengthening your relationship with Christ? 

40 days to rediscover your faith and reinstate Christ as the head of your life.  What would you give up?

I will be keeping you all updated on how Rediscover is going, and so will me friend on her blog (click here).  If you have decided to take the challenge, comment, let us know.  You can also e-mail me at writingforhisglory@gmail.com for encouragement and accountability.

God bless you all!

“Now flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.” ~2 Timothy 2:22

Merry CHRISTmas

God in human flesh, a baby laid in a lowly manger.  The mystery of all creation, tucked away in perfect humility.

That night God offered a gift so small and pure, a child, his son, the love of the world.  Jesus, the Christ, the savior of all.

Angles song out the glorious news, shepherds and kings welcomed and worshiped him, while the world watched and wondered.    

He came as a baby, he lived as a servant, he died in sinner’s place, he is returning, a king.

Remember that night, in the stable, a cave, in a little town.  Jesus was born in innocence and love, to gift to the world is very life and blood. 

Remember the reason for the season.   

Merry Christmas,

God bless.

-Laura

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